• Blessed are the constipated for they don't give a ****.
    Blessed are the constipated for they don't give a shit.
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  • Surrender now or we release the dogs. I pulled up my pants, flashed the toilet, sprayed some air freshener, washed my hands and calmly walked out and I said, you are in the wrong apartment.
    Surrender now or we release the dogs. I pulled up my pants, flashed the toilet, sprayed some air freshener, washed my hands and calmly walked out and I said, you are in the wrong apartment.
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    I am the problem but also the solution. Depending on the day.
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  • Sometimes I want to be mysterious and quiet but unfortunately I have thoughts and a mouth. Very unserious combination.
    Sometimes I want to be mysterious and quiet but unfortunately I have thoughts and a mouth. Very unserious combination.
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  • Some days I feel deeply blessed. Other days I’m just grateful I ate and didn’t cry in public. Growth is not linear, lakini we move.
    Some days I feel deeply blessed. Other days I’m just grateful I ate and didn’t cry in public. Growth is not linear, lakini we move.
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  • Can't stop laughing
    Can't stop laughing 😂😂
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    It's scary each and everyday 😢😓
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  • Curious to know, do you guys set a target for reading books each year? Like do you say, "I'm going to read 150 books this year" and then do it? Ama ni vibes and inshallah tu?
    Curious to know, do you guys set a target for reading books each year? Like do you say, "I'm going to read 150 books this year" and then do it? Ama ni vibes and inshallah tu? 😂
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  • My biggest achievement last year was starting a book club and ensuring it remained active. Our one year anniversary is this month Yay Me!
    My biggest achievement last year was starting a book club and ensuring it remained active. Our one year anniversary is this month 🥳Yay Me!
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  • I really want to learn how to build a website, but damn, does Python have to be this hard and confusing?
    I really want to learn how to build a website, but damn, does Python have to be this hard and confusing? 🤧
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  • Badass Girlies
    I thought of the title long before I had the content on what I would write about. But i'm here now, so I might as well keep going. I really love women. Not in the intimate kind of way, no. In the general sense that I have seen women do extraordinary things. For me, motherhood continues to be the extraordinary thing I do daily, raising a whole human, while still navigating life myself, juggling...
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  • THE MAID THE KING WANTED

    It was already too late when I finally understood that my acceptance into the palace was never just about work. When I was chosen by the prince to serve as a maid in the royal palace, I never imagined that the king desired my presence more in his private chamber than in the courtyards where maidens worked. I thought I was there to sweep floors, wash linens, and earn a living. I never knew fate had woven something darker and more complicated around my destiny.

    From the very first week, I became the most disliked maid in the palace. I came there only to work honestly and send money home to take care of my sick mother. Yet whispers followed me everywhere. The maidens discovered that the prince treated me differently, and that alone was enough to turn their hearts against me.

    I never truly understood why I was so hated. I was new, poor, and unimportant—or so I thought. I was brought into the palace personally by the prince, and that alone made me suspicious in their eyes.

    The first time I ever saw the prince was in the market square. That day, the sun was hot and unforgiving. I was hawking cocoyams with a basket balanced carefully on my head, shouting prices with a tired voice. My mother was ill, and I needed money to buy her medicine. My father passed away long ago, leaving us with nothing but stubborn hope.

    Suddenly, guards surrounded me.
    “Beautiful maiden,” the prince called.

    “My prince,” I trembled, lowering my eyes. “I hope I have not offended you?”

    “How do you know I am offended?” he asked calmly. “Because I am.”
    Fear rushed through me. “I am sorry, my prince. Tell me how I offended you, and I will correct it.”

    “You offended me,” he said, “because a maiden as beautiful as you should not be hawking cocoyams under the burning sun.”

    I swallowed hard. “My mother is sick, my prince.”

    “Is it your duty to care for your sick mother?” he asked gently, then paused. “Where is your father?”

    Tears gathered in my eyes, and I could not speak. He noticed immediately and frowned.

    “I did not mean to reopen old sadness,” he said softly. “But you should have come to the palace for help.”

    “I do not know the road to the palace,” I replied. “And even if I did, no one would allow me close to you. Please, what can I do to appease you?”

    “Come and work in the palace,” he said. “Where I can see your pretty face every day. I will take care of your mother if you accept to work as my maid.”

    “As a maid, my prince,” I said quickly. “Even as a servant, I will gladly come if you save my mother.”

    That was how everything began.
    I never knew that a poor maiden, the daughter of a struggling farmer and widow, could attract such attention. When I arrived at the palace, murmurs followed me.

    “Since she came, the prince treats her differently,” they whispered.

    What they did not know was the secret between the queen and her son.
    One evening, the queen had given the prince a royal necklace and said, “The day you see the maiden you want as your wife, place this necklace on her neck. Let her wear it always. When I see it on her, I will understand. But do not tell her your intentions. I will watch her character first.”

    Unfortunately, the secret did not remain secret.

    Wantoh, one of the palace maidens, was deeply in love with the prince. She overheard the conversation while pretending to clean nearby. For two long years, she tried everything to win his attention. Then I arrived—a mere maid—and suddenly the necklace she had dreamed of was no longer on the prince’s neck.

    The day he placed it on mine, my hands trembled.

    “For your beautiful smile that brings peace to my heart,” he said, “wear this necklace. It carries good fortune.”

    “I am only a maid,” I protested. “I am not worthy.”

    He smiled and placed it on me himself. “It represents royalty, loyalty, and trust. Promise me you will never remove it.”

    “Why, my prince?” I asked.
    “One day,” he said, “you will understand.”
    That was the day Wantoh’s hatred for me became fire.

    “How can Shiyla just arrive and receive what I have waited for?” she said angrily to the other maidens. “Whoever helps me destroy her image before the prince will be rewarded when I become a princess—and later, queen.”

    But there was a greater danger none of us could ignore.

    The king.
    The king was known for his wandering eyes for beautiful young maidens. Every maiden knew it, even if no one dared speak openly. One evening, he summoned me to his chamber. I thought I was called to arrange his bed or tidy the room.

    But his words told a different story.
    The queen was away that night.
    The king looked at me for a long moment and said softly, “Come closer.”

    Fear crawled through my bones. He spoke of my beauty, my obedience, and how loyalty should be rewarded. His intentions were clear without being spoken aloud.

    My heart raced. I realized then that my presence in the palace had drawn dangerous attention—attention that could destroy me if I made one wrong move.

    That night, I learned that being chosen is not always a blessing.
    Sometimes, it is a curse dressed in royal silk. I was brought by the prince who asked me to be loyal to him and not allow any man to touch me but now his father the king was luring me to himself.

    Episode 1

    Written by: © Gambo Elvis

    To be continued only on:
    PAUL Elvis christian stories
    Do you want more of this story
    THE MAID THE KING WANTED It was already too late when I finally understood that my acceptance into the palace was never just about work. When I was chosen by the prince to serve as a maid in the royal palace, I never imagined that the king desired my presence more in his private chamber than in the courtyards where maidens worked. I thought I was there to sweep floors, wash linens, and earn a living. I never knew fate had woven something darker and more complicated around my destiny. From the very first week, I became the most disliked maid in the palace. I came there only to work honestly and send money home to take care of my sick mother. Yet whispers followed me everywhere. The maidens discovered that the prince treated me differently, and that alone was enough to turn their hearts against me. I never truly understood why I was so hated. I was new, poor, and unimportant—or so I thought. I was brought into the palace personally by the prince, and that alone made me suspicious in their eyes. The first time I ever saw the prince was in the market square. That day, the sun was hot and unforgiving. I was hawking cocoyams with a basket balanced carefully on my head, shouting prices with a tired voice. My mother was ill, and I needed money to buy her medicine. My father passed away long ago, leaving us with nothing but stubborn hope. Suddenly, guards surrounded me. “Beautiful maiden,” the prince called. “My prince,” I trembled, lowering my eyes. “I hope I have not offended you?” “How do you know I am offended?” he asked calmly. “Because I am.” Fear rushed through me. “I am sorry, my prince. Tell me how I offended you, and I will correct it.” “You offended me,” he said, “because a maiden as beautiful as you should not be hawking cocoyams under the burning sun.” I swallowed hard. “My mother is sick, my prince.” “Is it your duty to care for your sick mother?” he asked gently, then paused. “Where is your father?” Tears gathered in my eyes, and I could not speak. He noticed immediately and frowned. “I did not mean to reopen old sadness,” he said softly. “But you should have come to the palace for help.” “I do not know the road to the palace,” I replied. “And even if I did, no one would allow me close to you. Please, what can I do to appease you?” “Come and work in the palace,” he said. “Where I can see your pretty face every day. I will take care of your mother if you accept to work as my maid.” “As a maid, my prince,” I said quickly. “Even as a servant, I will gladly come if you save my mother.” That was how everything began. I never knew that a poor maiden, the daughter of a struggling farmer and widow, could attract such attention. When I arrived at the palace, murmurs followed me. “Since she came, the prince treats her differently,” they whispered. What they did not know was the secret between the queen and her son. One evening, the queen had given the prince a royal necklace and said, “The day you see the maiden you want as your wife, place this necklace on her neck. Let her wear it always. When I see it on her, I will understand. But do not tell her your intentions. I will watch her character first.” Unfortunately, the secret did not remain secret. Wantoh, one of the palace maidens, was deeply in love with the prince. She overheard the conversation while pretending to clean nearby. For two long years, she tried everything to win his attention. Then I arrived—a mere maid—and suddenly the necklace she had dreamed of was no longer on the prince’s neck. The day he placed it on mine, my hands trembled. “For your beautiful smile that brings peace to my heart,” he said, “wear this necklace. It carries good fortune.” “I am only a maid,” I protested. “I am not worthy.” He smiled and placed it on me himself. “It represents royalty, loyalty, and trust. Promise me you will never remove it.” “Why, my prince?” I asked. “One day,” he said, “you will understand.” That was the day Wantoh’s hatred for me became fire. “How can Shiyla just arrive and receive what I have waited for?” she said angrily to the other maidens. “Whoever helps me destroy her image before the prince will be rewarded when I become a princess—and later, queen.” But there was a greater danger none of us could ignore. The king. The king was known for his wandering eyes for beautiful young maidens. Every maiden knew it, even if no one dared speak openly. One evening, he summoned me to his chamber. I thought I was called to arrange his bed or tidy the room. But his words told a different story. The queen was away that night. The king looked at me for a long moment and said softly, “Come closer.” Fear crawled through my bones. He spoke of my beauty, my obedience, and how loyalty should be rewarded. His intentions were clear without being spoken aloud. My heart raced. I realized then that my presence in the palace had drawn dangerous attention—attention that could destroy me if I made one wrong move. That night, I learned that being chosen is not always a blessing. Sometimes, it is a curse dressed in royal silk. I was brought by the prince who asked me to be loyal to him and not allow any man to touch me but now his father the king was luring me to himself. Episode 1 Written by: © Gambo Elvis To be continued only on: PAUL Elvis christian stories Do you want more of this story
    Love
    9
    4 Comments ·374 Views
  • They hate us coz they anus
    They hate us coz they anus
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    9
    1 Comments ·102 Views
  • A bold, and deeply practical vision tailored for local realities.
    Read more here
    https://www.housekoech.com/linkmtaa-is-more-than-just-an-app
    A bold, and deeply practical vision tailored for local realities. Read more here https://www.housekoech.com/linkmtaa-is-more-than-just-an-app
    WWW.HOUSEKOECH.COM
    Linkmtaa is more than just an app
    Linkmtaa is more than just an app. It is a statement about what African innovation can look like when it is tailored to local realities. It is about building platforms that don’t just entertain or connect, but empower and transform. Koech K. Emmanuel’s vision is bold, but it is also deeply practical.
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    2 Comments ·381 Views ·1 Shares
  • Love
    6
    ·168 Views
  • Good morning...and as you start your day remember...it's not about what they said...it's about how you choose to take it.
    People's words do not define you but how you respond to their words makes out your character #newweeknewpriorities #beyourself
    Good morning...and as you start your day remember...it's not about what they said...it's about how you choose to take it. People's words do not define you but how you respond to their words makes out your character #newweeknewpriorities #beyourself
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    Wow
    9
    1 Comments ·174 Views
  • There’s not enough banana hate going around and I need banana haters to rise up.
    #ihatebananas #cancelbananas
    There’s not enough banana hate going around and I need banana haters to rise up. #ihatebananas #cancelbananas
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    9
    8 Comments ·197 Views
Linkmtaa https://linkmtaa.com